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He Only Wants to be Friends
Ask Eda...: I am really good friends with this guy. We spend 4-5 nightstogether every week. He always wants to pay when we’re out doing anything. 1 time we did fool around but didn't finish due to his getting hard issues. (he is older) ever since then he hasnt treated me the same. He still comes over and hangs out and wants to pay for everything but hes less friendly physically. I also had one of his friends approach me and tell me that he told them he only wants to be friends with me and until i can get that he doesn't' want anythingto do with me. Yet he has never said that to me and keeps introducing me to more important people in his life example friends, family even kids. What should i do or what do you think? Michele Dear Michele, Everything that you have described about this guy leads me to believe you are actually dating. Uh... he pays for everything when you are together, you spend the majority of the week together, and you fool around. Isn’t that really the definition of the beginning of a relationship? You say he is older (although you don’t say how much older than you or your age; not that it matters) and he has issues with getting hard? Whoa! Stop right there! Having trouble keeping it is one thing, but if he isn’t even able to start that is worrisome. Obviously you care for this guy, otherwise you wouldn’t have come to me, right? You think it could be going somewhere until one night he can’t perform. Now his friends are telling you he only wants to be friends and until you can deal with that he wants nothing to do with you? Really? Michele, it seems like he is having an issue with his issue! A guy doesn’t just introduce you to all the important people in his life, put you on a pedestal and then tell you, I’m sorry, have his friends tell you he only wants to be friends. I would confront him. Don’t go in guns-a-blazin. But let him know that you’re not quite sure where this came from and if it is important to him then he should be discussing this matter with you, not having his friends pass the note in class past the teacher! He doesn’t sound very mature for being “older”. If you can get that far, then I would address the whole “issue”. I mean they do make little blue pills just for that these days. Of course it could be that he really doesn’t feel that way about you; but he needs to be a man and explain that he loves your company but he only wants to be friends, if that’s the case. At that point you have a choice whether you want to continue being around him or not. Can you handle just being his friend or do you want more? Of course if he blows you off and doesn’t want to talk about it at all then he’s not worth your time. Whatever you do, don’t play into the high-school-games bullshit. After all, there are many men out there who can do all for you that he has and more, even without the little blue pills :) Eda Leave He Only Wants to be Friends, Return to Problem Advice Return to Love Sources Home from He Only Wants to be Friends |
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