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Never Forget How to be Romantic

Many couples, after some time together, forget how to be romantic. It’s depressing really. Boy meets girl, boy and girl woo each other; he brings flowers, she cooks elaborate dinners, they make love often and hold each other until the morning. They fall in love with everything about each other and show it in many ways. And then… they get to know each other and realize that they are not this idealization of perfection and that they are both humans who each have flaws. Uh oh…

After we figure out that they really are just another Joe Shmoe like all the rest of us and have other responsibilities that supersede pleasing our every request and can not be at our beckon call (nor give us an orgasm when ever we want), for what ever reason we tell ourselves (and them) that they have “changed.”

The infamous What happened to the girl/guy I fell in love with? Sound familiar? We don’t change per say, but we tend to forget the little things that we used to do to make each other happy (and some of us just get lazy). So, what is it that many of us do once we fall into the This isn’t what I signed up for?

We either break it off simultaneously looking for the next night-in-shining-armor or damsel-in-distress, or we remember how to be romantic; we remember all the little things in the beginning that they did to make our hearts flutter and we remember all the little things that we did and said to them that make them continue to want to make our hearts flutter.

When my boyfriend and I go out to dinner I make it a point to investigate all the couples at surrounding tables. Most of the time, my view is not very pleasant. I sit and eat and talk to my boyfriend but I notice that most of the other couples look at and are involved with all of their surroundings other than the person they are with. They only make eye contact and speak to each other occasionally; maybe give a half-ass smile here and there. How frighteningly sad!

My mother once told me about this couple; on every Friday night they would order the same food, from the same place, and would drive to the same pier and they probably talked about all the things they wish they had done and about how they wanted so much more. When she told me this, I always told myself I will never be that boring, I want the fairy tale. We all want the fairy tale right?

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with creating “traditions” and of course that could have been the most romantic thing in that couples lives, but we also have to spin a little spontaneity in there!

We all create our own fairy tales. When is the last time you bought a card or flowers and it wasn’t on Valentines Day? When was the last time you wrote “I love you” on the bathroom mirror after you got out of the shower so they would see it after they took theirs?

Sometimes it can be the smallest of things that put a smile on their face and make them think about you throughout the day (and maybe give you that orgasm the same night!). It is up to us to keep the romance alive. Life happens and it’s not always going to be a dramatic scene out of a romance novel. It is sometimes hard and frustrating and tragic, but we have to remember to do the little things; we have to remember how to be romantic.



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